Pleasure Desire Stimulation Sex as your ageing
Netflix’s, “Grace & Frankie” created a storm with the episode “The Focus Group”, we see Grace (Jane Fonda) and Frankie (Lily Tomlin) whip out a few of their senior-friendly Ménage à Moi vibrators for the first time. “Oh my God, it’s beautiful,” Grace gushes, as Frankie adds with reverence, “It’s so light. It’s like I’m holding a cloud.”
Grace and Frankie are women in their 70’s who decide to start their own sex toy business, targeting 60-year-olds. They focus on the soft feel of the silicon, controls that light up so they can be seen in the dark, or seen more easily for poorer eyesight. Not to mention the benefit of using a sex toy to do all the work, as arthritis pains are a condition many older audiences are contending with.
In the episode “The Focus group”, when Grace & Frankie invite over some friends they realise they have made a mistake. Unfortunately, the women who came over ended up being part of a deeply religious prayer group. The ladies in the focus group are shocked over the idea of masturbating with a vibrator and sharing the results with a group. Even with the religious stigma and after everyone leaves they find one of the vibrators has gone missing.
This show is hilarious and eye-opening for those that think sexual drive decreases as you age. I highly suggest you check out the show:
Demand for vibrators & sex toys for the older audience has been highly overlooked. There are stores online like PleasureJardin that cater to men or women who are too shy or embarrassed to be seen walking down the street with a vibrating phallic-shaped plastic bag. Now more than ever it is easy to buy your pleasure product of choice and have it delivered in discreet packaging and avoid the awkward exchanges of a shop keeper. Pleasure is not and has never been “black and white” there are so many shades of grey. Mature markets, Bondage, Dominatrix, polyamory, fetishes, role play, and many more.
The Hard Facts
While the frequency or ability to perform sexually will generally decline modestly as seniors experience the normal physiological changes that accompany aging, reports show that the majority of men and women between the ages of 50 and 90 are still enthusiastic about sex and intimacy.
“There is no age limit on sexuality and sexual activity,” – Stephanie A. Sanders, Ph.D., assoc director of the sexual research group The Kinsey Institute.
The majority of Men & Women aged 45 and up say a satisfying sexual relationship is important to their quality of life, according to a survey by the AARP (the American Association of Retired Persons). Among 45- to 59-year-olds with sexual partners, 56 percent said they had sexual intercourse once a week or more. Among 60- to 70-year-olds with partners, 46 percent of men and 38 percent of women have sex at least once a week, as did 34 percent of those 70 or older. It is clear to see that seniors still manage to rock the bed.
A Duke University study showed that 20 percent of people over 65 have sex lives that are better than ever before. Although not everyone wants or needs an active sex life, many people continue to be sexual all their lives. There is a chain of thought that people who continue to be sexually active live longer and stay in relationships longer, it’s the intimate connection and the release of hormones within the body that keep that “spark”.
Louise Wellborn of Atlanta, Georgia, 73, believes deeply in the benefits of good sex — at any age. “Sex keeps you active and alive,” says the former businesswoman. “I think it’s as healthy as can be, in fact I know it. That’s what kept my husband alive for so long when he was sick. We had excellent sex, and any kind, at any time of day we wanted.”
AARP. Sexuality at Midlife and Beyond: 2004 Update of Attitudes and Behaviors. May 2005. http://www.aarp.org/research/family/lifestyles/2004_sexuality.html
- S. Census Bureau. 65+ in the United States: 2005. December 2005. http://www.census.gov/prod/2006pubs/p23-209.pdf
AARP. “Modern Maturity Sexuality Survey, http://research.aarp.org/health/mmsexsurvey_1.html
Feifer, Eric. “Determinants of Sexual Behavior: Middle and Old Age.” Journal of the American Geriatrics Society: Vol. 20. 1972, pp. 151-158.
Jacoby, Susan. “Great Sex: What’s Age Got to do With It?” Modern Maturity. Sept. 1999, pp. 43-48.
Mayo Clinic. Erectile Dysfunction. January 2008. Last Updated: Jan 1, 2020
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